Pinch
by Carolina-not-Caroline
Summary: Every night since her fateful arrival to Alexandria, Daryl wakes her up with a pinch, and Beth is determined to make him stop doing so. Beth lives. Bethyl mild smut. Follow up to Fear, but can be read individually.


She loves Daryl. The universe knows she loves that man, but at the moment she wants nothing more than to murder him.

She knows that the miracle that they live is difficult to believe. She understands his fear of everything that happened and is happening is just but a cruelly kind dream.

She knows, and she understands, but she swears if Daryl interrupts her sleep one more time she will murder the man. Simple as that.

Every night since her fateful arrival to Alexandria has been like this. Every night she gets awakened by a squeeze on her forearm by his thumb and finger. She gets awakened by his pinch, and tonight is no different.

She is cradled in his muscular arms. His chin lies at the top of her head, and if anything it seems like he wants to soak her up and have her live inside his chest, somewhere she would not mind living in. He murmurs a sorry against her head and then proceeds to gently rub her skin in the place he pinched her.

She knows, and understands why he pinches her, why he has to do it.

She knows, and understands because it is still difficult for her to believe too that she found him again. It is still unbelievable to her that she survived getting shot in the head. It is tough for her to believe too that she did not die that day at Grady. It is a hard for her to believe that she is there lying in the arms of the man who she unconditionally loves and who loves her back.

So she knows, and understands why he pinches her. She just wishes that he could finally believe that she is there, that she is not going anywhere, that she is not dead.

She wishes that the life had not been so cruel to him before, thus making him now doubt every good thing that happens to him. She wishes that he never had or has to suffer. It is a difficult thing to wish for considering the world they live. However, she once told him that it would not kill him to have a little faith, and she is determined to remind him of that everyday. She is determined to remind him of anything he needs to be reminded of.

And he seems to completely be sure that what they are living is not a dream when the sun lights them up, but when darkness arrives and there is nothing to distract him from his treacherous thoughts he starts to doubt. He starts to doubt and not even the fact that she is lying on his arms; with her head on his chest reassures him that she is real.

Pinching her is the last thing he does to reassure himself. He told her he hates doing it, absolutely detests it but he has to do it because the pinch he gives himself is not enough. He always pinches himself before he resorts to pinch her. He pinches himself but he told her that that does not work. It does not work because he has grown accustomed to physical pain and a pinch does nothing to alleviate his mind, the place where his worst pain lives.

He pinches her because it awakens her. It makes her open her eyes and to him her eyes are the most reassuring things in the world because they are the window to her soul. He tells her that he can truly tell that she is alive through her eyes because he can see everything that she feels through them and the fact that she is alive is well displayed.

He tells her of his previous fear of forgetting her. His fear of forgetting everything that they went through and the fact she existed would one day leave his mind. He showed her the drawing of her that Carl had beautifully drawn. It was worn and little faded but he told her that that drawing was what kept him going. He told her that he was pretty much another dead person walking after her supposed demise. He told her how he just kept living because he knew that she would not want him to give up, and she truly would not have wanted him to. He told her that he loved her so much. He cried into her stomach when he first saw her, which was a few days after her arrival.

He had been on a recruiting trip with Aaron the day she arrived and when she realized that he was not there along with her family she had crumbled. Yes, she was happy to see Maggie, Glen and their new born child. She was ecstatic to see a walking and talking Judith, but the person she wanted to see the most was Daryl.

The thought of Daryl was what kept her alive during her recovery in Grady. The thought of him, his eyes, his voice, his pride, and admiration of her was what kept her fighting through the days where she just wanted to give up. And when she saw that he was not there she thought the worse. Not even the reassurances from Rick, Michonne, or Carol made her believe that he was not gone. It was not until she laid her eyes on him and saw his blue eyes, his long brown hair, and his vest stitched with angel wings that she truly believed that he was not gone like she thought. When they hugged and gripped each other like a lifeline was when she truly relaxed though. That was the moment that she truly felt safe for the first time in a long while. In his arms she felt at home and she promised herself, that moment, that she would never be too far from his arms; from him.

She grew up a lot since the prison fell, since she was alone with him and had to deal with Grady. She traveled hundreds of miles in their wasteland of a world, so she was more than capable of taking care of herself, however she was not going to deny herself nor Daryl the need to be near each other, and their need to take care of the other.

She protected him and he protected her. They protected each other to no end, but it did always kill her that she could only do so much to protect him from his own mind.

That was why she hated when he pinched her. Yes, she hated his pinch because she was awakened from her slumber and after many nights of not getting many sleep, she treasured the fact that she could finally safely sleep, because she was in his arms. However, she hated his pinch because she hated his doubts. She hated his fear. She hated the fact that the world had been so cruel to him before that the idea of him finally being happy and settled seemed unreal to him. And even though she was angry that he had awoke her yet again, and could not get it through his head that she was there, and alive, not dead, she could never and was not truly angry at him.

Yes, she said she was going to murder him, but if anything she only wanted to murder every hesitant thought in his mind. So that was why she decided to finally reassure him in a way that was physical. She believes that sometimes physical touch was what could reassure a person of anything in the world so she was going to be doing that. She was going to give him physically pleasure and united them in the most primal way there was in the world, so that he could finally understand that she was there, and she loved him, and she was never going to leave him again.

Rising from the cradle of his arms, she gave his forearm a reassuring squeeze so he would know that she was not going anywhere. She could see through the light the moon provided that he seemed scared that he finally made her had enough. Leaning down and kissing his lips was her way of destroying that fear though. She would never have enough of him if anything. Kissing him with force and passion did deflate his somber mood and if anything it seemed to spur him on. Her plan was working, but kissing him was not enough.

Reluctantly leaving his lips she said, "I'm here Daryl. I'm here. Please believe that."

And Daryl nodded. He nodded to tell her that he believed, because she knew he did not have many words at the moment. She knew that man so well, that she knew that when things got overwhelming he lost his words. Something that she understood completely. Words sometimes are not enough.

So that was why she then went on to remove her shirt. Daryl, she could feel, was frozen after she did so. She had arrived to Alexandria three months before and they had solidified their relationship after she was three weeks in the town, but they had not gotten physical yet. She wanted to. She so wanted to, but Daryl was wary though.

He told her that he wanted their first time to be special, a time she suspected he wanted to be a day where they sealed their relationship in the most official of ways, but she had had enough. She just could not wait until the day they got married. A date that she could care less when it was, but was forced to wait on because Alexandria needed a wedding to lighten things up. She knew that Daryl did not want a wedding, and she did not want one either but Deanna demanded, Maggie enforced, Aaron and Eric begged so they were stuck having a wedding.

But now she threw caution to the wind, because her love was going through so terrible things in his mind, and she could not have that. She was his protector after all. So after she threw her shirt carelessly behind her shoulder, she went on to grab Daryl's hands and placed them on her chest.

"Feel it, Daryl. Please feel it. Feel my heart beat. It's beating. It's beating for you."

She had tears on her eyes by then. And thanks to the moonlight she could that Daryl did too.

He took the reign of his hands from her and did as she told. He felt. He added pressure to her chest so that he could feel more forcefully her stomping heart. He sat up from the bed and then took her hips so she straddled him. He caressed her nude skin and then pressed her to his chest. She could feel his heart beat too. It was stomping like hers, on the same beat, and it was the best thing she had ever felt.

"You're alive" Daryl then whispered into her skin, and she nodded.

She realized in that moment that she needed the reassurance just as much as he did. So she pulled back and went on to kiss him again. This kiss was gentle, soft, slower than their previous one. In that kiss they allowed each other to truly feel the other; more than the other times they had kissed before. With that kiss, her need for him intensified so she began to move against his lap. She moved back and forth against him, and he was already hard. She could not help but moan because even with just that, she was over the moon.

He called out her name as she began to move faster. She could tell he was overwhelmed too because he was eagerly moving against her, and that was when she decided that what they were doing was just not sufficient.

Moving her lips from the side of his neck where she had been kissing and sucking him, she moved her hands to the hem of his shirt and lifted it off him. She knew about his scars, and she a long time ago reassured him that he did not need to be ashamed of them. Especially not with her. She had scars of her own and they meant she survived, and his scars meant he survived too, so there was no need to be afraid, she told him. She did not think any less of him because his scars, and when she asked him if he thought less of her because of her scars he rapidly shook her head and told her no. So that was that.

She went on to kiss his chest then. She went on to feel him too, because she needed guarantee as well. And Daryl did not hold back either. He felt and softly caressed her back and he gently traced her spine. He kissed and gripped her breasts, and he made her feel euphoric.

They were making love to each other and they were not yet done. Lifting momentarily off of him, she then went on to remove the shorts she slept in and her panties. With no shame whatsoever she sat fully nude in front of the man she loved so much, and the only man who would ever get to see her like this. And to make only things fair, then Daryl went on to remove the sweats he slept on, never once removing his eyes from her. If anything he was devouring her with his eyes and she absolutely loved it.

Once Daryl's sweats were off things became more real. There they sat completely nude in front of the other and the moment could not be more perfect.

Beth was a virgin and Daryl knew that. Her virginity was one of the reasons he wanted to wait and do things the right way, but it seemed that Daryl could not care less just like she did. It was like the need to feel the proof that she was truly there, not dead, and alive debunked the need to do things traditionally, and she was so glad about that. She could care less if Alexandria wanted a wedding. In that precise moment she felt more married to Daryl than any couple who believed they were married just because they had a ceremony, a priest, minister, or paper that said they were.

Moving their positions so that she now laid on her back and Daryl next to her, Daryl then went on to stroke every inch of her. He started on her face, and he caressed her scars, her eyelids, eyebrows, and eyelashes. He lovingly moved his fingers against her nose, and lips, and moved downwards to her neck and collarbones. He caressed her breasts, and kissed them too, just like he had been doing to her face and neck. He moved his hands through her belly button and poked it, which caused her to giggle.

Smiling himself too, he then went on to touch her in the place where no man or woman had touched her before. He moved his fingers through her pubic hair, and then reached the apex of her thighs. She was completely soaked. Which was a good thing. It was her first time and she was going to need lubrication, and she had it. Daryl, however, knowing that she was more than enough lubricated still went on to work her with his fingers.

She knew the last thing he wanted was to hurt her, and at that moment she loved him more than it was possible. She could not believe she had gotten so lucky, and found a man who cared about her pleasure.

And cared he definitely did because the pleasure he was giving her was phenomenal. He was rubbing her clit just the right way; with a gentle, but more than enough pressure. And when he placed a finger inside her she could not help but swear because everything was outstanding. However, then she started to feel something she never felt before, something not even her own fingers had ever done for her, that even words like outstanding and phenomenal were not enough words to describe how she felt.

If she thought about it later she would say that in that moment she felt loved. She cried his name then, and when she opened her eyes, as the ecstasy wore some off, she found him staring at her. He was looking at her as if she was the oasis to his desert. He was looking at her like she was warmth on a bitter cold day.

He looked at her so lovingly that she wanted to cry, but instead she grabbed his arm and led him to move on top of her. He, of course, followed her lead willingly, and after he was settled himself on top of her, he kissed her. He kissed her for a long time, he had no hurry at all, and neither did she.

He kissed her, and continued to do so as he lined himself up with her and pushed himself inside of her for the first time.

The sensation was foreign. It stung to be stretched but she liked the feeling. When he hit her barrier though, he stopped. He took his lips from hers and looked intensely into her eyes. She saw the reassurance he was giving her that everything was going to be fine, that he would stop if she said so. However that was the last thing she ever wanted. So with her eyes she begged him on. With her eyes she reassured him that she was alive and that that moment was more proof of that.

So he pressed on and she felt a pressure as he broke her hymen, but she did not tell him to stop. She would never tell him to stop.

He sat inside of her for a few minutes both to revel in the feeling of being inside of her wet and tight core, and to give her some time to get accustomed to him. When she nodded that was when he finally moved. He thrust slowly into her and trusted some more.

She was positively sure that that was the best moment of her life. The sensations he was giving her where indescribable and she never felt so loved. She moaned and moved her hips, as well, to arouse things more. Also, she discovered that the sound of Daryl Dixon in pleasure was the best sound in the whole entire world. She loved the sounds coming out of him and if that was not enough to give her, her second orgasm of the night, then Daryl speeding up and placing his fingers on her clit again definitely was so.

She came first with a soundless mouthing of Daryl's name coming from her lips. It was like she lost her voice completely as she reached glory. As for Daryl things were the same. He lost his voice too as she shuddered and came, but she could feel him mouthing her name soundlessly too, as he collapsed into her torso and sunk his face to where her neck and right shoulder met.

In that moment she was in glory, heaven, paradise whatever you would like to call it, and as Daryl whispered into the night that he loved her, she knew then that she would never be awakened by a pinch ever again.

She would not because every night to prove to him that she was alive; she was going to do this. She was going to make sweet love to her Daryl until he finally understood that she was alive, not dead, and really there.

And then when he finally understood, she would make love to her man just because she really loved what they had just done. She definitely wanted to do it a million times more and, also, because she wanted to disturb his sleep too in glorious payback for all his pinches.

Fin.

 **Hey, yeah this is my first time writing smut, so please excuse it? Idk.**

 **Someone asked me if I would write a Beth lives version to the one shot I wrote** ** _Fear_** **, and I thought about it and said why not. I am not Team Delusional, because I have no faith whatsoever in the writers of TWD, and their writing abilities, so I have accepted the heartbreaking fact that my sweet Beth is dead. That doesn't mean you should stop believing she's not dead if you do. If Beth is in fact alive then I will applaud your confidence and deem myself an idiot. But anyways I'm not TD but I do really wish Beth wasn't dead and with that sad Daryl Dixon and that's why I choose to write this. I feel like it would be very difficult for Daryl to easily believe that Beth is alive that I had to write about him needing reassurance. I will say that the whole pinching Beth thing to see if she was alive was an idea I drew inspiration from another Nicholas Sparks book (yes a damn romance novel). I hope you guys like this fic, please review, have a good day, and never stop shipping Bethyl.**


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